Network Nostradami

You have to be kidding me. I love tv, and lament that I don't have more time to watch it. But some things are such bad ideas that even the fact that they appear on that magical box in my living room can't save them. Tomorrow night, FX is airing Smallpox. Briefly, the premise is apparently that one man infects himself with smallpox intentionally, and the whole rest of the world gets it as well. It's the bio-terrorism we've all been waiting for!! But it's just a movie, right? Well, not according to FX's ingenious tag line: "It's all true. It just hasn't happened yet!"

The message board on the movie's website has some typical back and forth drivel: those convinced that the movie will instruct REAL terr'ists step-by-step how to successfully mount such an attack vs. those that think they're already planning it anyway, so we might as well know what we're in for. And even some people who seem to think that showing the movie might discourage real bad guys from trying it. You know:

Ahmed: Are we ready with the smallpox, my friend?

Mohammed: No, no. We were all set to go, but turns out FX already came up with the idea and aired it. Paris Hilton says smallpox is not hot anymore, and she does not love it. Back to the mobile weapons lab!

I have a real perverse desire to watch this movie, even though, in addition to how bad an idea I think it is to promote this thing as "true," the 30 second trailer has already convinced me it is really really poorly written/directed/acted. I'm a bit fascinated with infectious disease. Outbreak is one of my all-time favorite movies; I've read books on diseases, from the Black Death to ebola; I've considered going back to school to get a Masters in public health. Since there's no Simpsons tomorrow, I likely will watch this crap. And I hate myself for it.