Seinfeld Lives

It doesn't compare to Jodi's Aunt Natalie, but I had a conversation worthy of an episode with my Grandma tonight. She asked me if I had eaten dinner yet. I said yes. We talked about something else for 45 seconds or so, then:

G: Did you ever make anything with the salsa?

Now, I start thinking, "Did my grandma buy me some salsa anytime in the past 5 years (or, more likely, buy some when it was on sale 7 years ago, and bring it to me 3 years post-expiration)?" But no, she wasn't referring to any particular salsa, she was just using "the" like old people do, for real. (Anyone remember that comedian who used to do the routine on old people - putting "the" in front of everything (his example was "the Pearl Jam") and drinking coffee with everything?) So I said, "What?"

G: You know. The salsa. We eat the salsa sometimes with the chips. But you know, you can cook with it too.

L: Uh huh.

G: Yeah. I bet the chicken would taste good with the salsa.

L: Yeah. When I eat chicken tacos, I put salsa on them.

G: Oh, well we don't really like that. But the salsa with the chicken. I might have to try that some time.

Now, keep in mind, all this came after her telling me the story of how her opthalmologist told her yesterday that he will remain her opthalmologist for 30 more days, but after that, he refuses to ever see her again. Nonstop fun, my family.

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I really didn't want to, but I can't help it. I like Boston Legal. It is not just because of the hot chicks (but, say it with me, "that doesn't hurt.")